[Article by Russell Swisher.]

Off to see a Battle of the Bands with Klingons versus the Federation, I expected to see ’70s heavy metal clad in Klingon leather and the wildly musically diverse Five Year Mission.  I admit I was way off.  I have seen Five Year Mission live at Local’s Only, but I had little knowledge of what the alien-costumed Il Troubadore would bring.

A door was prematurely opened, and I was allowed in about 30 minutes before the show.   As a Trekkie, I was delighted by the stage set as the bridge of the Enterprise.  I witnessed the final application of makeup to one of the Klingon musicians.  It was obvious from the get-go, this was to be a strange match-up.  Five Year Mission is a five-piece band with seasoned veterans of small venue, old school rock and roll.  Il Troubadore is nothing of the sort.  This group seemed more like a string quartet, even though two of the players were not stringed.  This looked more like a night of rock and roll versus folk music.

The show started with Five Year drummer and cut-up Andy Fark opening the door and shouting, “Oh my God, it’s time!” as the fans outside began to enter.  The MC announced that this was a battle between the smooth foreheads versus the ridges.  The bands shared the stage, watching and sometimes heckling each other as they alternated three-song sets.

Five Year Mission kicked off the night with one of my favorites, “Charlie X.”  Their Vox and Peavy stack of amplifiers were not the best for the airplane hanger-like, acoustically inspired ballroom (not the best place for sound), but their gutsy and gritty rock and roll made you feel like you had stumbled into a local pub on a Friday night.  Their first three song choices perfectly showcased how far up and down they boldly go on the rock and roll genre scale.  One song sounded like a tribute to 1950’s Brtish rock and the next took you right into rockabilly.  Their use of acoustic and electric guitars gave every song a different feel.  Their no-nonsense approach drifted through melodies reminding the listener of the simple function of rock and roll.  They could build a song with a slow rock riff, then just take off, or they could use the absence of percussion to emphasize a mood.  All five of these seasoned rockers took turns leading their original Star Trek episode-inspired songs.

As Five Year’s first set ended, an Il Troubadore member smirked, “When does the rock and roll begin?”  The quartet began with their mandolin, cello, and hand drum sound-driven Klingon music, which sometimes sounded very Mediterranean.  It was very folksy and very somber, sung mostly in Klingon.  Some of their songs hauntingly heralded Klingon Victory while another was about nuclear holocaust.  This music clashed with rock and roll like beer and exotic flavored ice cream.  But it was fun.  Their sets included a culture-filled sound that  belly dancers would rush too.  And just as the audience began to feel overwhelmed, they would break out classic rock and roll covers like “Another One Bites the Dust”, sung only as a Klingon could with deep baritones and maniacal falsetto.  The covers were a total surprise and wildly funny.  This highly skilled group played Klingon, Ewok, Middle Eastern, and even classic rock.  One song sounded like a sea shanty and the next had a Guess Who feel.

The heckling flew ferociously between sets.  My personal favorite came when the Federation band said something like, “At least we don’t eat our children”, and the Klingons responded with “But why not, they are delicious?”

What a night for Indy Star Trek fans.  The night ended in two collaboration songs. One was based on the original Star Trek episode “City on the Edge of Forever”.  The other was a screaming tribute to the Bat’leth in Klingon language.  This was a very strange battle of the bands in deed.  It was often cheesy, but it was an entertaining clash of musical cultures.